I don't want a lot for Christmas but there is just one thing i need...

Things have been jolly ever since December began. There are many things to jingle about and many things to rebuttal. To which this next verse shall harken to your memory.

 On the first day of Christmas,  Santa came to my house first. HA HA. I mean HO HO. The 20th was my Christmas via Skype. I saw Momma Kissing Santa Clause over skype, and the headless wiseman under the Keese tree, also the Iowa snow. I also was witness to the Christmas traditions over skype. We read the Christmas Story, from Matthew this year, then ripped a new one into the presents. If you were every so lucky all my kin received hashi (chopsticks), inden (japan deer skin), and usually something to the effect of a Dragon Ball Z eraser (to those who we catch watching this TV show on Saturdays- not to name any reindeer but DAD you are ridiculous!). Well we were definitely rocking around the Christmas Tree and enjoyed Christmas early. (ps if you didn't notice I completely Jingled the bells (wrote a part of a Christmas song) in every sentence- just checking your pulse to see if it is set for Christmas!)

On the second day of Christmas, There was a Staff Christmas party called an Bon Enki. (a Christmas bonus party- hence bon enki!) It was well lets say interesting. I had some firsts. One first was I was asked what my blood type was! It is a common thing here for there is a belief that different blood types mesh better than others. (who came up with this I am not sure but the saying is true- know your blood type before coming to Japan.- ok I made up that saying but it is true!) Also, I was asked what my hobby is. (again in Japan the word Hobby has no plural- you only have one) SO I said- I am an American so my Hobbies are golfing, running, ect ect... (not to bore you). (this person was kinda surprised). Another first, I was refereed to as Japanese. To that I gave the Japanese BEHHHHH? I asked why and to this truthful account- He said "I was not like most American women who were loud and chatty but quiet and elegant." (put that in your pipe and smoke it!). I felt very unsure at this moment what I should do, either bow or bow lower? Three stereotypical Japanese things happened BEFORE the party! To this I graciously pass to you entrusting that you will use the information as evidence that I can be somewhat Japanese. ( I am short, ELEGANT, QUIET, I take my shoes off everywhere I go, I say Behhhh as much as the rest, I say Summimasen and Gomenasain in every sentence, I tend to bow often even when I do not know if I should, yeah you could say I am pretty Japanese). (oh ps- i have already asked if i dye my hair and wear colored contacts- To this I say no I was born this way- sorry to offend your previous stereotypes of people with green eyes and blondish hair!). 

On the Third Day of Christmas,  we have made so many snowflakes that my eyes are going buggy. Well I am to teach Christmas to students- to which I can answer but three words- JESUS Jesus' Birthday and Christmas trees (well that is more than three but forgive my lack of erasing that and writing five). So I used pics from home to officially blow these children's minds. I make sure they think that most every American goes to Church on Christmas, that we really celebrate Jesus' Birthday, and maybe we have headless wisemen- (the third is a lie but I wanted to). I thus start this Christmas decoupage of Christmas Pics from favorites of mine. The lights in my apt, the my house (to which they say wow so big- and its midori (green)), Christmas Cookies (what no Christmas Cakie??) and The biggest ham (hamu) I could find on the internet- looks like a spiral ham on vacation! They are just completely blown to shreds then I add we are making snow and they fall off their chairs and we call 119- the (911) of Japan. (Ok maybe they fell off their chairs because my presentation was horrible and they were falling asleep but they did fall. Anywho- I tell them how to fold the paper and give the best model snowflake possible. It rocked- I was pretty sure they could not top it. Well much to my no-so surprise- they did. They are way older than my second graders and well lets say these things are like masterpieces. ( Thus I have been practicing ever since). Dag yo! Well at least Jesus was brought up many times and he gives grace to my lack of snowflaking ability! 

ON the fifth day of Christmas, a my blog gave to me, unbelievable falsehoods... (please return and sing the last line like the song thus proposes). Ok, I have received some quite shocking quite outlandish comments from lets say the last blog I wrote... To these who will remain name scrambled rabeD, and miJ....HWHAT? this can not be accepted not agreed with. Lets take a little walk in the past..... Last blog (imagine a dream bubble appearing and yeah you get the drill) I was writing about how I saw Brittany Spears on Japanese TV and how she was not good in America so she needed the humble "I will clap even if it is horrible" style of the Japanese culture to cure my need for fame. And after this such clever remark I am thus ripped a new one by remarks such as Brittany is my "hero" and "I agree with rebeD". Can this be born, it can not!  and Will be shot in three for two shots are not as cool as three. How can such an alliance of falsehood be brought about? This liking of one who is so far below the line of sanity? Is this to reflect my clever rebuttal of her sanity? To those who think my past rant as a twisted cry for her honor, I say- If I had a poster collection of heroes there would be five posters. Jesus for he is def number 1 and does look sweet on posters, Jon Chu (director of Step up 2) who satisfies my need for break dancing by keeping it alive and plugg'n it with more BASS, Gene Kelley who dances, sings, and directs (seriously does anything else need to be said),  well probably Martha Stewart- before the felonies, and an origami Crane- because they are sweet! As you see Brittney didn't make the top five let alone the top 100 of my heroes. So with this quick and painless vial of truth the rebuttals are blow to pieces. I only say this because it takes one to accuse and two to solidify the cement (because two people blowing air on the cement defiantly makes it dry faster than one!) NO more drying cement! No Brittney! 

So this is Christmas Eve in Japan. I am enjoying a great movie and making Christmas Cards for my teachers! Later yall! 

Remember: Snow is not bad unless you have lots of it! Be careful out there!

~MOlly