To know yourself....To know how to deal

The ideas of knowing yourself is so vague. Between that and the ideas of love- puking into a 12 oz can of Monster sounds more enjoyable. To know how you will react in every situation- impossible till they are right in front of you. What if you found a snake in your bathtub, or the feeling you will get when you realize you are going to another country, or maybe your best friend says they are getting married or surprise you are that one in a million winner toothbrushes for a year. To avoid danger/change we tend to view others errors or adventures- which are not a reflection of your life but of their life. There is this wish that some human mistakes can be gaurded against because of others influence is seemingly unrealistic. Thought we at Just a Guz like to be impecably ahead of most things there is just some things that are seen but not heard till the time they break the sound barrier. Time to celebrate, cry, feel the need to be moved, to forget, to remember, these are the questions asked by many who feel this inability to adapt to the sudden/ not so sudden changes of life.  So funny we decide that if we do what others do it will make our lives easier and less stumbling. But not everyone plays the "knife game" correctly first you have to loose some fingers. This life process is full of change and self awareness which kick the can of your life jumble the pieces till you run over and hit base. Is base safety or just a moments break till you learn your next piece of advise? Some advise is harder to handle and some is pretty enjoyable- like the time I added more butter to the cookies than I thought and they actually came out even better than if i had followed the directions- or the time "someone" thought life would be better with tight rolled jeans in 2008- life is full of changes- and for those who don't like change- I say "holla at your JaG" because there are those who "love" change and those who will use flexibility in their job interview in hopes that some day they may be flexible enough to be successful the ideas of change. To both I salute you! We need changers and changeless to help us realize who we are which we will only find out when we have expelled all emotion and time. So for those of you who are human- step back take time to realize how small you really are- not to bash yourself- but to take from each situation the joy and sorrow of life but to also see the larger picture of Chuck Norris not karate chopping the neighborhood gangster but serving the world with justice. 

Remember: Not all which is written is to be understood- it is to explore the brain in hopes that some day you will look back and laugh because that could have been the most ridiculous thing you could have said!

~MOlly 

Read if you like but if you don't want to don't but please leave your remarks to yourself we don't want to hear your stupidity...

Here at Just A Guz we like to represent many avenues of the blogging world. From news articles, opinions, to the personality of the person behind JaG we try to show the world there is no one way to blog. Blogging is a reflection of life wherever it happens. SO after disclaiming and mission stating this blog sight Just a Guz chose to endorse a website tonight...

Why an endorsement, well for those who endorse (Politicians excluded) it is more of a rarity for endorsers for if you choose to endorse the choice is come by many toiling days.. or just a few great laughs.

Tonight we are endorsing a website called passiveaggressivenotes.com. What you may ask? yeah a blog set up which finds great passive aggressive statements and letters around the world and places them on their blog. The thought and brains behind these types of statements are so impressive and clever I laugh each time I peruse the merch! to honor this please join me by clicking the highlighted hyperlink and enjoying the ridiculously clever statements. Another way to honor this is to write your own passive aggressive notes- which can easily be shared by blogging a great passive device...... So here it goes

To those who like to get on the interstate at 25 miles per hour you obviously had a blind drivers education instructor because your lack of knowledge in driving almost cost many their lives. So if you want to drive try following the law (drive the speed limit) try it it works for most. OR just get off the road and turn yourself in for stupid driving. For those who drive the speed limit or  more thank you for knowing driving consists of pushing on the gas pedal. 

Remember: If you ever smell something burning first look out the window- it could be your next door neighbors foreclosed house. 

~MOlly

Tonight in breaking news......

While surfing the national news centers I have stumbled onto some news which is astounding, breathtaking and somewhat odd.. Oh for the love of America stay tuned....

Do you have "airness"?

Some town close to you might be hosting a air guitar challenge. Keep your eyes posted you may be attending and barley even notice because the contestants are not playing their guitars they are playing air guitars. To my knowledge these things do not just happen in smaller quantities but in multiples. There was a contest I was able to see on CNN that hosted this contest. The judges were looking for the "lack of" real guitars and the obvious "airness" of guitars. The rules were something like this.. if you bring a guitar, broomstick or any device which could be used as a guitar then you would be disqualifies and probably thrown out and the judges were looking for this "airness" and to them this was something unexplainable but felt while they watched the contestants. So my question to you is do you rock your air guitar? DO you have the "airness"?

Leave your laughs at the door...

Another breaking news article read by Just A Guz- no more laughing in a local bar called Trinity Grill- this is not in IA in another state which will remain nameless till you look it up! You may not laugh for to laugh you may get fired as one bartender quickly found out.  She was working another night just as before. She and a man who was drinking were laughing (probably at bartender jokes) and making small talk when her boss comes out and says- stop laughing. She asks why  and he replies it is straying away buisness and if you laugh again you will have to leave. She asked- are you serious, and he said- you may leave you are fired. What??? you may ask- us hear at Just A Guz thought that as well. To be fired for laughing? I would be fired on spot! But any who thankfully she had a secondary beading business to back her for a while. SO do not laugh anymore America or you will be fired! And two- if you have any need for a laughing bartender- she is your lady!

Well this breaking news was brought to you today by the Des Moines Public pools saying hey give the pool staff a break and jump off a local bridge the water is free and the swimming is fee also! So stay safe and come back next time when Just a Guz find more amazing stories from America.

Remember: If you wanna eat shrimp and live far away from the Ocean- remember you could always move or eat chicken- they don't taste the same but hey you get more meat!

MOlly

It's all about the reversal of the short jeans!

Hello yall! Since the "grind" is calling and I do not mean Carmel or French Vanilla whole beans, I shall expand my mind to positive things which to my knowledge uplift and create an explosive personality. (To those who think- all about being happy? did you not say in a prior blog- its all about anger? Who are you confusing) Well to those who seem to be confused let me enlighten your thoughts- Concentrating on the anger helps bring about change for the better, focusing on happiness then lets this change be easier and hopefully send more endorphins to the brain. So lets try to think think think about what makes us happy....... some say.... Happiness is

1. Smelling their favorite desert

2. Spas

3. Getting dirty

4. Jumping into a bucket of noodles

5. Medications

6. Tuna and noodles

7. Making payments on time

8. Being able to support their family

and the list would go on longer but now Just a Guz reflect on what happiness is- why- to be deep and make me not want to read your blog again? Of course not- this is reflective journalism- trying to take time to think about happy things.

Just a Guz would say: Happiness is

1. Running- though it seems to be a painful experience- a great release of life

2. Time to reflect/blog

3. Time with friends

4. Laughing- not the piddly stuff but the gut wrencher kind

5. A good night sleep

5.5-Music 

6. Night Quill- at the moment of pure sleepage- not after you wake up

7. Having 5 mins to breathe and not say a word

8. Music

9.Knowing that no matter what happens some one has your back (pointing upwards)

10. Frosted Animal Crackers-(iced A's)

11. Gum- God was definitely thinking of me and many ADD children- not that I  have ADD but uhhhhhh..

11.5 Music

12. That feeling that you get when you Guz a pop (that feeling you get in the back of your throat)

13. Bodies of Water-I use all five senses for that one!

14. Not talking- i know you don't believe it

15. Being understood- not to win but to understand each other

16. The feeling of a good snuggle

16.5 Michael Buble, Rihanna, and right now-Joel Auge- yes please!

17. Fires- if they would only not make you smell bad

18. Mac computers

19. Dissonance (music kind)- the kind which sometime is never resolved

20. Waking up a half hour later than before!

These things make Just a Guz feel a sense of happiness- thought silly- just the thought of a good one of these keeps everyone at JaG up on their toes! This to say- think about something good today and who knows your day might actually turn into a pile of crap- but your head is up high and you survived!

Remember: It may seem like you like green paint but until you try it out on a small portion of the wall you may never know if it is pea green- or blueishy- greenishy- brown! 

~MOlly

Lay or Lie down?

When I think of words I am unable to understand I resort quickly to those words which to our Ears "sound" the same but have different spellings- your know the homophones. To lay or lie- thought seemingly straightforward (and sound somewhat different)- can be ambiguous even to the most educated- which at Just A Guz- seems to have some difficulty with! But what about read-read, or red-read, or rose- rose, or crackpot-cracked pot? To this I say- good luck learning the English Language! Due to its many rules, regulations, and origins may be seen as a over zealous mutt of languages. So try but you may never win. (try to spell that word which means excessive amount or supply- that is a sure-fit!)

To this I give a toast- "May your words be numerous in quantity and little in quality- for to say to many "expensive" word is to give up your savings!" And who likes a friend who spends all their money in one place!  

Remember: When you get that urge to play shuffle board, it doesn't mean you need to go on a cruise you may just need sometime alone with set of chopsticks- and hey they are much less expensive and way more fun!

~MOlly

How to eat like an Olympian

12,000 calories-

 Breakfast- dozen pastries, i egg McMuffin- Mc D- 3800 cal

 Snack- 1 scoop whey-100 cal

 Lunch- Chinese buffet- filling about 8 plates- 1400 cals

 Snack 2- Subway meatball sub- 1600 cals

 Dinner- 6 cups of fried chicken curry, 1 whole bbq chicken, 6oz steak, fried potatoes- 2400 cals, 

Snack 3- five granola bars, 1 medium bag of chips, 3 cups of pop, a can of nuts- 2000 cals= grand total around 12,ooo calories! 

Now this is not the most nutritional 12,000 calories a person could eat but is about the size of a meal for one Olympian. He has to eat 12,000 calories a day in order not to loose weight. Talk about every meal a 7 course meal and snacks the 5 course meals! 12,000 calories is about what a average lets say- girl- would want to eat in a week if not less! What??!?!  Who is this guy?- Mr. Midnight Buffet? 

As a side note- If you envy this person-(which I would be surprised if you did!) Hey if it is food you want- just eat- it is not worth counting about 5 lbs of extra fat on your body a day- or working out as much as he does! 

Remember: Cut your nails- Who likes people who have ridiculously long nails! (not your computer!)

~MOlly

Let me tell you a story of long ago.....

 Once upon a time.... there was a girl who lived in a state which has lots of rain. It rained lots and lots and rarely stopped. She needed to mow the so called "lawn" which had magically turned into a wetland...

So this is the beginning of the most ridiculous day a girl had in a while. So it was beautiful this last weekend and yard work needed to be done. So mowing was top on her list because like you can see she was hidden in the long lawn. 

Hello back there- get out before you get eaten by the angry weedman!!!!  So this feet of great patience and skill was undertaken with a push mow and lots of sun. First, the girl thought to go in all the dry spots and then go grab boots to help her in this wetland. But much to her surprise (or first step) this very wet bandit was going to be much dirtier business than expected. (thus the above pic- not hairy legs but of wet, muddy, grass covered legs!) So she kept trudging along till - (kirsplash!)

Water up to her shoelaces. Oh NO! What to do- the blade cuts at about two inches! Then a marvelous idea came to her head- (45 degrees- a better cut- and less water throwage?) yes please! And it worked- about 2 hours later done with the wetland- and more the muddier! What girl could possibly dominate such a impossible and unheard of event? No one may know but know that anything is possible with water, fire, and some gasoline!

Remember: If you are ever asked to makeup a story on the spot leave out the bear- climbing to the top of a mountain to get wings and fly back to his friends!!!

~MOlly